Dumfounded _Now You're Talking...raison d'etre

1. Dumfounded and deadpan ugly
2. Actually I am quite beautiful...inside. The degree of separation from truth and light is paralyzing.
3. Uga-buga is an obscene gesture. I want to believe that I believe, even when there is nothing to believe in. I love you. My simple mind is in control.
4. It is a fine evening for caterpillars and now the death threats of our great early warning weather persons. Strong winds are threatening and be very worried if you cross bridges. Seriously!
5. There are huge bolders. Got to do what you got to do. Churning rapid thing. Lots of rain. Please God ... Let the blue tarps save us.
6. Devastation... and a lot of people have suffered and I should not make remarks...such as I have, but best that I reveal my sarcastic/rude side, too. Possibly, someone may be sent to rip me a new one.
7. I am hereby apologising for what I am sure was a futile and ridiculous attempt at levity and not intended to do harm.
8. I am embarrassed that I have not yet found the key to a smooth transition ...to a fluid location of the voice of me and my portrayal of this life language that wants to explain, where it is.
9. Here is the key. I always work in a totally distracted state. I cannot seem to extract the silent work area. This is not work or sport. I want it to be The Truth of me. My reality in real terms.
10. So here on a night, when I had no intention of doing what I need to do...I await the heavy rain and wind. A bad morning ahead. We will be just fine. Be strong and wet. Wind gusts up to sixty miles per hour. Oh my!
11. Sarcasm, ... more sarcasm or just say goodnight. Seems as though sleep may do more for me, than any more typing. This is hardly writing. Turn off this flow of goo.
12. Good day, Hubert Rainfield,esq.

Early In the Light of Love Sublime

1. I can find a way to begin, because it is right here at the ends of my fingers. I was hoping to get serious someday and find a way to be truth telling and still open to the moment, because the fluidity of the elements that I find have a friction and a verve for my senses, and I want to do this while I listen to a show I am not watching, but my wife was, but she left the room to go finish sewing a costume, she is doing for the nutcracker- That would be " The Nutcracker". The famous family fare for ballet school aficianados. My daughter goes to a very accomplished ballet school and every year they put on the Nut. And it is always redressed with new costumes and my wife has come up with another wonderful costume change for the five Chinese dancers, who are members of the troupe that come to Claire in her dream of a wondrous fairytale night in a Christmas world of snow and warmth and wonder. Sublime aren't I? Not.
2. This works. I don't know what I did to get this format, but I'm going to go with it. I think it means, I'm not supposed to spend too much time on any one thing. And that is ok with me, because I remain an experiment in confidence, and I want to break into the field of creating elements and controls, that have the zing that I need. I 'm not sure what I need. Mostly, I think I lack purpose for this vebiage that you see. Who am I talking/writing to? That must be me, because I am the only one, who reads it and it is a pleasure to say that it is all original .
3. Each paragraph is numbered. I hope I can figure out how to do this again. I spent much of the weekend reading other peoples blogs and so many are what I would call absolutely useless. For o' so many reasons...not worth repeating. My work on the other hand has integrity, because one day I will hang my hat on the past posts, that only confused and delayed the inevitable. The final discovery and unfolding of greatness... The one, who is me.
4. Cute. Life is wonderful. I talked to my parents in Virginia today, and they are quite well. My mom (is that capitalized/). What kind of writer are you? Back to work. That is why there is editing and I only write free-style at the moment, so this is the result and it passes as a futile, but not lothsome attempt at a glib reparte. I do not believe that for a second. I will say that mom and dad worked a water table at the Richmond Marathon yesterday. The weather was astounding and it was a great event for everyone and my parents as well. They both were in the service in WWII. Proud of them and I always thank them for their service. My attempt at being in the Navy was cut short. Not the way I wantd it to end, but there is quite a story there. Someday, maybe?
5. Nice. I am quite full of it tonight and that is good in the long run, because I am eventually working up to a real production schedule that will include deadlines and games for me to attain... The outcomes , that I will portray as the soul purpose.. of even beginning this way...will come down to reaching a balance of work and family and home and prayer and purpose. Getting rest and exercise along the way. This is the end of my first year as a blogger and I have come a long way...on the way back to where I used to be, when writing was my game as a student and connoisseur of the artfilled life of travel and engagement. Once upon a time and then life happened and I fell by the wayside and became ordinary,but very responsible.
6. Life is short... and if I am to get everything... I need to do before bed ... done, then I must wrap up the deed, that this has been. I would say that ...On some level it has been successful and I can be proud and happy, that I didn't let doubt get in the way. Actually, since noone reads it anyway... I can say that my other blog is on Blogstream and it is under the name-"Indubitable Paradox". Just type that in and you get a world of wonder and a pretty good blog... if I do say so myself. I'm a comer and this is going to be a really great year. I am looking forward to it. This blog is getting to be something,too. It really is about the integrity of believing in yourself and knowing that you have something to say. Only one of my sons has read either one. He was bemused, but said I should keep it up if it makes me happy.
7. The end comes here. Finally the weather in Richmond was ferocious today and my dad, aged 84, said his basement had flooded and he had been down there ...mucking it out. Fortunately, it has floor drains. My mom, aged 82, is recovering well from hip surgery. It hasn't been a free pass by any means, but they are getting the healing recovery thing accomplished with great spirit. Both Mom and Dad have been real troopers. They are doing the hard work themselves, but their friends, family and neighbors have also lent a hand. I'm out here on the West Coast, so my encouragement has been thru...being in touch.
8. All three of our boys are at home tonight ...in their own homes...with their own lives...Yipee! See I do care, but have no more time. Goodnight all. Hubert Rainfield esq....signing off /um?

Big Walley wants to see some changes around here. I got to write a little verse on the web tonight. I be getting brave. I believe the future of television is now. I am here to take my position in the scheme of the love founders of fame and fortune. Believers in the belief of us. Strength in numbers and purpose. We propose on our behalf the good fortune and patronage of all efforts exclusive to service of God's Love.

That is slightly over the top and I reasonably see the fault of getting too far out in front of current trends. This is not a money making strategy. It is merely a feeling of hope for outcomes that gives us hope and strength. I want to be a servant to hope and faith. We have synergy in the strength of what really is an outlook of outcomes that proceed from thoughts that care in depth about the service of all hopes and plans.

I feel the love of real things that are in my life. This is about purpose and being in the world with family and friends. I am not or should I say ... have not
been the most expressive and responsive of relatives in this world. I try to be there in the ways ...that are expected, but I haven't always been able to find the confidence that engenders the success of the real life... lived with heart and soul.

I am on the way off this channel tonight, but I will be back and this will become easier, because I am feeling the love of my sense of purpose and care and this effort means something to me...about becoming what I was meant to be. I will accomplish and eventually find all that I know is there...in spite of all the years of neglect. Reading about me in my mind as a friend to myself, before I can find in the world about ... the shape of me as a friend and consort to the associations of this life... that affords to me the hope of finding the real plan and purpose of this life.

Go there, now... Off to bed and get the rest that will bring to the new day... Breath and breadth and control. Strength and expression and belief. I am this funny little man, who makes jokes of me, because right now it makes me feel less full of myself. I want to swing from the chandeliers and fly through the air and be free and flexible and funny and brave.

It may be... that I need to become a friend of humor and satire ... as they are...possibly/ a satifactory guise for my serious aptitude to dig a whole deeper than I can successfully negotiate. All is new at this point. I will be going out on the limb, eventually. I am brave and stupid at the same time. I feel an original aptitude for danger. And eventually, I will return to the fold and be the hero... I was born to be. GOTCHA!

Hero talk... That is a hairy way to go young man. 57 years of you being scared to be you.